Because I'm a Woman

Because I'm a woman,

If I want to seem fun, I should go blonde.

If I want to seem mysterious, I should go brunette.

No, wait, I should go red so that I'll seem adventurous and sexy.


And Because I'm a woman

I should always strive to be sexy.

Note: "be sexy",

not, "feel sexy".

Because my sexuality isn't for me,

or my pleasure.

God, no.

What ever gave me that silly idea?


Because I'm woman,

I'm told to be thin,

with curves.

Cut out the carbs.

Skip dessert, even though I want it.

Try intermittent fasting.

Try detoxing.

Cleanse the ugly out.

Track the calories.

Burn the fat.

Be strong.

Lift heavy.


Wait, am I supposed to feel this light-headed all the time?


Because I'm a woman,

I should embrace getting older.

"The wisdom of aging is a gift!"

But the evidence on my face is not welcome here.

Fine lines that tell 30 years of stories,

of my laughter and my pain,

of my sorrow and joy.

Lift, inject, plump, poke,

freeze them away

and pretend.


Because I'm a woman,

I should have babies.

Lots and lots of babies.

I should get full and round.

My belly, worshipped.

My glow, praised.

Until the baby I grow within my body, is there no more.

And the light that was me starts to fade.

My belly stays soft and squishy.

I cry as my hair falls out in wet clumps,

that I stick to the shower wall,

trying desperately to collect the remnants

of what was.


All anyone wants to do is hold the baby, but who is holding me?


Because I'm a woman,

I'm expected to

Tighten

Tone

Smooth

Gloss

Soften

Bend

Break- and not tell anyone when I do.


Because I'm a strong woman, right?

I should smile through it.

Except that I can't,

because of all the Botox,

remember?


Because I'm a woman

I'm taught to be softer,

be smaller,

be careful,

watch what I eat,

watch what I say,

watch my drink,

watch over my shoulder,

grip the keys with white knuckles.


Because I'm a woman,

they warn me:

Not to stay out late,

to not talk to strangers,

to not be rude,

or disrespectful.

"Just say no".


But Because I'm a woman

they will ask:

What was I wearing?

How many drinks did I have?

Did I go alone?

Why didn't I just leave?


I thought saying "no" was supposed to be enough.

It should be enough.


Because I'm a woman,

If I don't do more, be more & achieve more,

while earning less,